It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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