Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
