im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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