Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize