She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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