thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
My vagina just recognized that song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Randomize