absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.