I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
