That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
