Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
