4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
