dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Randomize
