There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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