non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
You pole danced in your parka.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
