I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Randomize
