Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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