After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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