Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
