He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
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A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
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So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!