Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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