I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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