8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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