was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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