It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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