We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
