so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
