I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize