god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
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