Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.

  (1-850): View more from Florida

  Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.

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  (850): Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now. (1-850): Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel. http://tfl.nu/j1ot
  Replies (80) Good night (3923) Bad night (579)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta

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  (513): Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta http://tfl.nu/m4p5
  Replies (37) Good night (3758) Bad night (533) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding

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  (904): we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding http://tfl.nu/10zj
  Replies (3) Good night (3182) Bad night (612) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...

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  (315): My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships... http://tfl.nu/1r9u
  Replies (43) Good night (3084) Bad night (6583) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.

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  (207): Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me. http://tfl.nu/7so1
  Replies (20) Good night (2922) Bad night (1010) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?

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  (865): What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"? http://tfl.nu/h7i9
  Replies (11) Good night (2265) Bad night (1659) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  I don't understand but I'll be there in 5

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  (860): Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt? (1-860): I don't understand but I'll be there in 5 http://tfl.nu/rms0
  Replies (7) Good night (3208) Bad night (583) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy

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  (717): The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy http://tfl.nu/dgrf
  Replies (8) Good night (888) Bad night (2160) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?

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  (405): I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke? http://tfl.nu/as8o
  Replies (14) Good night (2117) Bad night (500) Order T-Shirt
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.

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  (317): hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room. http://tfl.nu/qubv
  Replies (14) Good night (619) Bad night (2110) Order T-Shirt
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  (713): View more from Texas

  I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.

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  (713): I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester. http://tfl.nu/tak8
  Replies (2) Good night (769) Bad night (928) Order T-Shirt
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  (626): View more from California

  We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40

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  (626): We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40 http://tfl.nu/yjln
  Replies (3) Good night (1394) Bad night (414)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way

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  (407): Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way http://tfl.nu/o4pg
  Replies (19) Good night (2110) Bad night (432) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.

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  (541): People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized. http://tfl.nu/aj4f
  Replies (1) Good night (271) Bad night (180) Order T-Shirt
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  (305): View more from Florida

  He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.

  (1-305): View more from Florida

  Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?

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  (305): He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire. (1-305): Are you fucking a guy or a condo building? http://tfl.nu/f6au
  Replies (4) Good night (1100) Bad night (94)

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