i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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