How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
