So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
