Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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