I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize