There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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