Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
MIDGETS
????
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Randomize
