I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
