I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
