what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
