Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
