you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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