I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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