i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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