there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
