I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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