just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
