im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
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He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
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I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
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