Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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