Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize