Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
