Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize